Palin and the Pope: the post-2012 Parousia Punditry

Pundits have been asking whether the Pope will visit the White House sometime after 2012 when President Palin takes office.  It is thought that it might be preferable if Vice-President Todd Palin met with the the Anti-Christ in the event that Pope Benedict has not retired by that time.

While the Palin administration will not be an openly Pentecostal administration, it will a Bible-believing administration.  Secretary of State-designate Larry Kroon has already put pretenders on notice: ever since it was learned that some members of the elders of Vice-President Cheney's United Presbyterian Church were in fact known Methodists, Todd has reminded all federal employees that he is only a phone call away when vetting future Cabinet members and that those with information can e-mail him at any time.

When it was suggested that some senior Senators might meet with the Pope prior to 2012, it was noted that this could be a political quagmire as the Pope had been a Nazi in his youth in Poland.

Even the recent moves of the Pope to restore Irish bishops who had been removed for teaching creationism in their Latin classes in boys-only academies - definitely a better choice than teaching "Leda Raping the Swan" and other such Latin poetry that predated the establishment of the papacy and the false church in Rome - have not served as an answer to Palin's searing question: "How's that touchy-feely thing going for you evangelical Catholics now, eh?"

When asked whether any elders of the Eastern Orthodox Church might be present at an historic Pentecostal-Papal gab-fest, a theological advisor to the Cabinet-in-waiting has suggested that it is too soon to open a dialog with the communist churches that had so long oppressed Protestants in Russia, Southern Mongolia and Tibet.

The new Cabinet post for Missionary Service will, we understand, be open to all Protestant denominations, but it will be staffed to reflect the theology of the new White House.  Hugh Jackman, spokesperson for World Visions, has been touted as a possible candidate, although his agent has been somewhat vague on his theological standpoint.  It would be unfair to ask for more, as only so much theology can be conveyed in a 15-second HULU.com advert.

It is expected that the Palin IRS will be investigating the tax-free status of both Scientologist and Catholic "churches" - but only in the second mandate of the new presidency and perhaps only in its latter days.  The Church of Christ Scientist and their fellow-travelers, Jehovah's Witnesses, are thought to be more suitable targets in a first term given their record in converting innocent evangelical children to their heretical pseudo-faiths.

Meanwhile, Seventh Day Adventists have been slow to respond from their community straddling the borders of Washington and Oregon somewhere south of Walla Walla to the decision by Walisa-based Walla-mart to require all "sales executives" (individual consumer account managers) to at least operate cash registers on Saturdays.  As members of the board, the Palins are not thought to have much influence on daily operations so long as employees "Keep The Faith" and remember that the Holy Spirit is the best part of the Entrepreneurial Spirit (and so much easier to spell!)  A closer advisor has suggested that this Sabbath ruling really is not too great a hardship for these polygamist communities where mothers can take turns working these Saturday shifts.